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He had but three shirts； one on his person； the second in the mode； and the third in the washerwoman's hands。 He renewed them as they wore out。
They were always ragged； which caused him to button his coat to the chin。
It had required years for Marius to attain to this flourishing condition。 Hard years； difficult； some of them； to traverse； others to climb。 Marius had not failed for a single day。
He had endured everything in the way of destitution； he had done everything except contract debts。 He did himself the justice to say that he had never owed any one a sou。 A debt was； to him； the beginning of slavery。
He even said to himself； that a creditor is worse than a master； for the master possesses only your person； a creditor possesses your dignity and can administer to it a box on the ear。
Rather than borrow； he went without food。 He had passed many a day fasting。
Feeling that all extremes meet； and that； if one is not on one's guard； lowered fortunes may lead to baseness of soul； he kept a jealous watch on his pride。 Such and such a formality or action； which； in any other situation would have appeared merely a deference to him； now seemed insipidity； and he nerved himself against it。
His face wore a sort of severe flush。 He was timid even to rudeness。
During all these trials he had felt himself encouraged and even uplifted； at times； by a secret force that he possessed within himself。 The soul aids the body； and at certain moments； raises it。 It is the only bird which bears up its own cage。
Besides his father's name； another name was graven in Marius' heart； the name of Thenardier。
Marius； with his grave and enthusiastic nature； surrounded with a sort of aureole the man to whom； in his thoughts； he owed his father's life；that intrepid sergeant who had saved the colonel amid the bullets and the cannon…balls of Waterloo。 He never separated the memory of this man from the memory of his father； and he associated them in his veneration。
It was a sort of worship in two steps； with the grand altar for the colonel and the lesser one for Thenardier。
What redoubled the tenderness of his gratitude towards Thenardier； was the idea of the distress into which he knew that Thenardier had fallen； and which had engulfed the latter。 Marius had learned at Montfermeil of the ruin and bankruptcy of the unfortunate inn…keeper。 Since that time； he had made unheard…of efforts to find traces of him and to reach him in that dark abyss of misery in which Thenardier had disappeared。
Marius had beaten the whole country； he had gone to Chelles； to Bondy； to Gourney； to Nogent； to Lagny。 He had persisted for three years； expending in these explorations the little money which he had laid by。
No one had been able to give him any news of Thenardier：
he was supposed to have gone abroad。 His creditors had also sought him； with less love than Marius； but with as much assiduity； and had not been able to lay their hands on him。
Marius blamed himself； and was almost angry with himself for his lack of success in his researches。
It was the only debt left him by the colonel； and Marius made it a matter of honor to pay it。 〃What；〃 he thought； 〃when my father lay dying on the field of battle； did Thenardier contrive to find him amid the smoke and the grape…shot； and bear him off on his shoulders； and yet he owed him nothing； and I； who owe so much to Thenardier； cannot join him in this shadow where he is lying in the pangs of death； and in my turn bring him back from death to life！
Oh！
I will find him！〃 To find Thenardier； in fact； Marius would have given one of his arms； to rescue him from his misery； he would have sacrificed all his blood。 To see Thenardier； to render Thenardier some service； to say to him： 〃You do not know me； well； I do know you！
Here I am。
Dispose of me！〃 This was Marius' sweetest and most magnificent dream。
BOOK FIFTH。THE EXCELLENCE OF MISFORTUNE
CHAPTER III
MARIUS GROWN UP
At this epoch； Marius was twenty years of age。
It was three years since he had left his grandfather。
Both parties had remained on the same terms； without attempting to approach each other； and without seeking to see each other。
Besides； what was the use of seeing each other？
Marius was the brass vase； while Father Gillenormand was the iron pot。
We admit that Marius was mistaken as to his grandfather's heart。 He had imagined that M。 Gillenormand had never loved him； and that that crusty； harsh； and smiling old fellow who cursed； shouted； and stormed and brandished his cane； cherished for him； at the most； only that affection； which is at once slight and severe； of the dotards of edy。
Marius was in error。 There are fathers who do not love their children； there exists no grandfather who does not adore his grandson。
At bottom； as we have said； M。 Gillenormand idolized Marius。
He idolized him after his own fashion； with an acpaniment of snappishness and boxes on the ear； but； this child once gone； he felt a black void in his heart； he would allow no one to mention the child to him； and all the while secretly regretted that he was so well obeyed。 At first； he hoped that this Buonapartist； this Jacobin； this terrorist； this Septembrist； would return。
But the weeks passed by； years passed； to M。 Gillenormand's great despair； the 〃blood…drinker〃 did not make his appearance。
〃I could not do otherwise than turn him out；〃 said the grandfather to himself； and he asked himself： 〃If the thing were to do over again； would I do it？〃
His pride instantly answered 〃yes；〃 but his aged head； which he shook in silence； replied sadly 〃no。〃
He had his hours of depression。 He missed Marius。
Old men need affection as they need the sun。 It is warmth。
Strong as his nature was； the absence of Marius had wrought some change in him。
Nothing in the world could have induced him to take a step towards 〃that rogue〃； but he suffered。 He never inquired about him； but he thought of him incessantly。 He lived in the Marais in a more and more retired manner； he was still merry and violent as of old； but his merriment ha